i won’t be online for awhile.
i’m back in vegas and i don’t have internet access.
crazy changes have occurred
so i think going with the flow will be in order.
much love everybody!
one of the nieces’ homework papers.
for some reason it jumped out at me
while i was cleaning.
not sure why yet
“down the rabbit hole”
these photos are so dark. it’s just dark here. maybe if the sun comes out i will try again tomorrow.
she shifted. morphed.
still going slow and steady.
[knock, knock Neo]
parts of her are stitched down now
[continuing the recording of my thoughts]
the process here has been easy. fluid. steady.
not too much wavering or over-thinking going on.
i’ve stitched when i can.
i set it down easily. and i pick it up easily.
it feels like detachment maybe?
maybe since she was not born with that invisible cast of guilt upon her, that underlying ‘struggle’ is gone.
the birth process. the incubation phase was done in my inner world. where my time is given it’s correct value. a moment taken to daydream is a valid moment there.
hmmm… more to think on.
over the past several days, i’ve been exposed to words that have shifted my perception.
been reading so many blogs that have so much in their new year’s posts (and comments!).
being in the NOW…
journeys tracks time…
round back to HOME…
i’ve seen these concepts before of course, but hearing them now in this leg of the journey seems to be the key.
the reality of there being this one moment has re-penetrated.
the importance of that being all there is. and that each moment takes care of itself.
moments seem to be important to me right now. sneaking moments here and there. and investigating why the perception of ‘sneaking’ is. this too has had a light shone on it through the BOOK grace has given me.
feeling that at any moment i may not be free to have this last holdout of me. stitching. a remnant of an image of my handmade life. thoughts of a life made by my own hands. of my own fashioning.
that at every moment, there’s a boogey man lurking just behind my shoulder waiting to take it all away. again.
but in THIS moment he is not here. i am sitting here on this computer typing FREE. free to type to stitch to read. and those moments are REAL, not fleeting, as my perceptions would have me believe.
and the last words i just read were :the word moment is rooted in the Latin word momentum:
moment –> momentum –> movement
moment is not a holding on to for dear life thing. it is an enjoying it for what it is thing. a thing that can propel me into the next one. and into the next…
i think this will be my thought beginning this new year/block of time…
[8:45a – 9:32a] looking for cloth, ripped or cut, partially pinned exactly what i saw imagined
[9:34 – 9:40] thought maybe she should be standing on some snow… found white cloth, ripped and pinned
[9:50 – 10:07] photos, chose and downloaded
— total about an hour or so
hmmm… this is the first time i’ve ever recorded time spent. and this was QUICK for me. wow. i have to think on this.
it was very enjoyable to just get to it. i was worried that it was going to be rushing mechanized thing, but it wasn’t. it was just very calm, straightforward, organized and non-confusing(?).
i need to think and write more here later.
i tried it. i did it. i imagined the process of putting together :contrarian: in my mind. and i fell asleep in the process. 2 hour nap. hahahahahha but i saw the fabrics, the techniques, the stitches.
now i will try to stitch it together as i saw it later on tonight. hopefully.